this is overdue

Ah well, my idea of updating this blog really down the toilet didn't it? Can't run a decent blog if you don't update it. I blame myself, I keep on forgetting I have the blog and I spend a lot of time of tumblr (way to much time). Being extremely broke and unemployed has sparked my blog interest again though, I'm sitting around not doing much besides waiting to hear back from future employers, so why not update the blog? A decent train a thought I believe. 
The whole daily update thing I had originally planned completely fell through (clearly) and I don't have that much conviction, so I think I'm gonna actually try to update weekly rather then the whole original update daily plan. I've figured out a way to organize the different types of posts on this dumb blog, so that's step number one. Since I've gathered a tiny following from TGS, I think people will appreciate life updates every once in a while, after all I'm charming as hell. And I've received a lot of advice seeking anons on tumblr, so I thought instead of giving short answers on tumblr, I could use here to give more in depth answers and such. I travel quite a bit, so putting my travel experiences and advice on here will probably fun too. And I'll start limiting my feminist rants to this blog as well. I've gotten progressively angry over the past year.
That's right, you haven't updated here in a whole year and then some! What's happened you ask?
- I moved out of Florida.
- Moved back into Texas.
- I was in a Harry Potter fan film!!!
- Met an incredible group of people who I am now pleased to call good friends. 
- I lived with my BFF over the past summer.
- I went back to college (community college).
- After going to community college, NBC's Community does not seem that far fetched.
- Worked out weekly???
- Been to LA twice, once for spring trip and once via road trip.
- Went to fucking FRANCE (will have to write a blog post about that sometime).
- Got accepted into a decent University (University of Texas) in a writing major.
- Played through the Mass Effect trilogy twice.
- And have gotten more progressively broke.
And that's basically the short of it. The Gathering Storm (the HP film) is something else I'll have to make a blog post about, since I never properly vlogged the behind the scenes properly stuff like I wanted to. But yeah, that's about it.
tl;dr I haven't committed to blog, but I will now. Will be filled with life updates, advice giving, and fun travel goodness.
Peace Out

this is today

When life gives you lemons, make lemon pie because lemonade is overrated.
I feel like my life has been a bit of a shit storm lately, but I'm bustin down doors and movin forward. That's what life is all about right? And by moving forward I mean updating this blog, like a normal blogger. Because that's what bloggers do right, actually write in their blogs? Wow, fascinating. Even if I just write a short little update, I need to be constant at least at one thing in my life.
My goal is to post every week day, and have something devoted to each day. Like, take Monday for example, every Monday I think I'm going to review a horror film I saw over the weekend because without out fail I see a some horrific flick every weekend. Not always exactly the horror genre but horrific none the less. Ya feel me? 
So this is how I think it's gonna go. Mondays will be a short horror film review [or actually an anime review if someone requests that oooohhhh that'd be fun] and maybe a recap of something exciting that happened over the weekend. Tuesdays will be a help you kind of day, like a life advice or writing help topic type thing, that'd probs be a good idea. Wednesday will be like a cute outfit recap, like a weekly update on the cutest outfit I wore the past week, it'll awesome I promise. Then Thursdays will be about whatever I can think of, maybe food, I dunno we'll figure something out along the way. And Friday will be a normal movie review, like a movie you can watch on Netflix or is in the theaters, depending on demand. And, now that I think about it, Saturdays can be when I post a vlog up here, like a travel type vlog thing, so I can work on my road trip vlog skills. Do ya'll think that sounds like a good plan?
So yeah, I think that is it for now! Stick around for more mostly fun stuff. I pinky promise we are going to have a lot of fun.
Peace Out.

this was not my day

Well. Today was different. Guess my blog got lucky because my life literally started to fall apart at the seams today. So I shall bring you some much unexpected drama, and breath some life into the blog with moderately good advice with how to deal with crap days. 

So, first thing first, let me push my god awful day at you. Basically, I learned I'm going to have to pay a shit ton of money to fix my teeth. Even better, the thought of all that money literally started making me cry in the office, but fortunately I was able to hold in my panic attack until I started driving home. Then my significant other decided to drop the bomb, over text mind you, that they felt things weren't really working out between us and if we don't change our pattern, we won't work out. Those two significant things plus a bunch of other crap all put together cause me to snap and I've been a blubbering mess all day. Sometimes things just really hit ya hard, ya know? I don't have it as hard as most people, but going broke over bad teeth is not my idea of good life, and the prospect of facing the future totally alone is also terrifying. Plus panic attacks only make me feel shittier.

No matter, I'll work it out. I usually do, and I've made it this far and all I can do is go up. I've hit rock bottom, and days like today are only stumbling blocks as I move forward. I mean, we all feel pretty worthless sometimes, right? Or helpless or pathetic, both of which seriously suck. But, more importantly, you got to recognize those feelings and just let yourself know that that moment of hard feelings doesn't define you. 

Bad days are never just one bad thing usually. There's always one shit thing that starts your day off, and nothing else really goes well. And to make it worse some other shit thing happens that day. It doesn't really have to be the most horrible thing, but it's something that just pushes you off the edge. That's the basic formula for a truly terrible fucking day. And once you got a terrible day over your head, there's not much you can do but mope. It's hard to be happy when you, say, fail a test and the find out someone keyed your car in the parking lot. It's just a wreck. I find the best way to deal with shit days is just to let them be.

Listen to sad music, cry when no ones looking, hug your pillow pet, question reality. Let the sadness get to you, but don't let it rule you. Some days you just gotta feel low so the next day you can feel high as a kite. The happiness won't come back right away, but once you pass what I call the "roll around in your own tears" phase is when things start to go back up hill.  Once you start to feel less like a pile of rejected iPhones, turn off your sad music, put away the sweets and go do something. Whether its a store run for more healthy snack or jog around the block, just get out of your comfort zone a little. Let the world bring you back to earth, get moving and let the endorphins get back in your blood stream. Literally just standing up and walking around a bit will help clear your head and make you feel better pretty quickly. Surprising I know, who thought physical activity of any sort would make you feel better. The human body is weird.

Now the last thing I do to get out of my bad day rut, is take a motherfuckin bubble bath. Its my comfort zone, and being surrounded in steamy water helps clear my head and relaxes me. And I usually watch my comfort show while I soak in the over-heated water, Community. It always makes me smile when I feel like poop. Now, your "comfort zone" is probably different then mine, but this is my recommendation, it works wonders for me. Maybe you like to watch your favorite movie and sit in a burrito blanket while doodling nsfw doodles of your current OTP, I dunno. But whatever floats your boat to a happy place is usually what brightens the day a little. Now, you're not going to be cured of your sadness, you're gonna think the day still totally sucked, sorry its true. The key is to just not go to sleep resentful. That extends the shittiness of the day, trust me I know and you probably know too. Try going to sleep with a least faint smile on your cute lil face. Even if you don't wan to, faking it until you make it is a magical thing.

NOW enough of the moderately pathetic shitty day survival guide. I'm gonna go take my comfort zone bath and watch the new season of Community some more. I wrote out my feelings, and feeling better already. Hope it might of helped you out a little too. Radical. Peace Out.

this is what we do

So I believe I owe you as a reader an explication. What the frick frack diddly dack patty wack snick snack crack pack slack mack quarterback crackerjack biofeedback backtrack thumbtack sidetrack tic-tac is this blog about? WELL, I don't really know. But here is a list of what I guess is going to go down, it'll probs narrow down as we go on.

 - Fashion type blog. I dress hella nice and my face is not ugly so I will teach you my ways my children. And I'll try to help with any of your questions.

 - Travel-ish blog. Whenever I go places I'm gonna blog the hell out of it. I love traveling so this will happen often aka whenever I can afford it.

 - Writer's block crusher. I'm writing a fucking novel. Writer's block seriously hits me sometimes so I will come here to write some sort of except to slice that block in bloody half.

 - Single life blog. I moved out completely unprepared, and as a total noob at being an adult, I am here to tell you what not to do. I have the magical skill of learning everything the hard way, and you think I'm exaggerating, but seriously I fuck up all the things. Learn from my miserable failures.

 - Other help blog. You have problem? Me fix with funny. Probably no help in end. BAM.

This is what my blog shall be and it shall be awesome. I hope. Probably not, it's gonna be a huge mess. Lets have fun with it. Radical.

Peace Out.

This is Me

So. Hey, whats up. Nothing? Ok, thats cool. Thats why you're here? Even better. Lets hunker down and do this.
So I totally read my first post I put on this blog FOUR YEARS AGO thats pretty crazy and I am crazy embarrassed. I was the most fantastic freshman, also I was a totally dweeb thank God I'm the only one reading this blog. NO MATTER. Whats that you say? You don't even care about that? You just wanna know what is this blog about? Who am I? I will answer one of those questions now.

I am Laura Blake. I used to go by the pseudonym Razuberri, and still kind of do on my tumblr and deviantart. But I've branched out so thus I go by my name now on most sites like Twitter, YouTube, and ta-da Blogspot too now. I also went by the pseudonym Oliver for a while and I almost want to go back that I realized what an adorable nickname it is, so if you call me Blake or Oliver I will love you. I have a weird thing for girls with boy names, I don't know where this came from.
A super general about me, I love film and thats what I really want to do with my life, write and make movies. I also adore writing, fingers crossed I can become a published author one day but for now my friends are my fans. Maybe I'll post fan art people draw? Yes. I also kind of dream of moving to Japan or New York or anywhere besides where I live now. I feel like most people feel this feel.

So, lets go in depth. My history? I grew up in Texas. I tried to start a blog in high school, you can see how well that went. I skipped out on college and took a gap year, also not going so hot. I moved to Orlando, Florida to live near a few friends I made in a pre-college program. A pre-college program at Ringling College of Art + Design, that was really fun. Now, I'm not having so much fun because I do spend a lot of time in front of my computer not doing much. But the plan is to do more. I live in Orlando so I must work at Disney right!? No, they wouldn't hire me, I have to many freckles to be a Princess....
Personality flaws and pluses? I have and have always had fairly serious anxiety. I have trouble existing in large groups and don't even get me started on airports, I literally break down every time I'm in one. Aka, I am the worst at dealing with stress and people. Getting that out of the way, I think I have some pretty great personality pluses. I'm usually a kind soul, but when I'm an asshole it's hilarious because I am very bad at being mean. So chances are I'll be nice to you because I'm awful at being a jerk. So that's great right? Sure. I make up for being a generally ok person in horrible grammar and a vocabulary similar to that of sailor.
Hobbies? Watching terrible horror movies on Netflix. Doodling my characters. Writing ahead of my timeline in my novel. Horseback riding. Yoga. Watching large amounts of American and Japanese cartoons. Learning French and Japanese. Photography. My hundreds of Fandoms. Cute animals. Fun stuff I know.
Work, I do it? Yes, I do. I sale people things they don't need and I drive around to do it, and its not my favorite but it pays me so I can roll with it. I also work as a sometime Nanny and pet sitter. Its my goal is to switch my job to working with horses at a barn thats fairly close my house. And blog, it'd be cool to make some money off of blogging. Or a Cosplay model, I like taking pretty pictures ok.
Future type things? Like a I said, in the future I would like to make movies and write books. And college as well, I plan to complete college at University of Texas at Austin with a degree in Filmmaking. After that, I actually really hope I can move to Japan to teach English and write my books and make videos and stuff. It's a ludicrous idea, but its currently my idea for the future. My "idea for the future" changes often, beware.

So that's really all I think of writing right now. I'll write another tiny tid bit about what this blog is about. Do any of you want to know anything else about me? Ask, I can answer you personally because there are so few of us. Radical. Peace Out.

Entering the War Zone

Hello random people of the internet. Since this is the first post, things are going to be awkward, so just sit tight as I get through the initial barrier of awkwardness. And yes, for all you stupid people out there, awkwardness is a word. So ha! Anyway, on what subject this might be, lets focus.

Im a teenager. I thought you should know that, so you can prepare yourself for whatever drama might slip itself in. OK? Don't stop reading cause I happened to be in the prime of my youth, matter of fact, keep reading! I have a voice, so your going to deal with it and keep on reading! Sure, I might not be the 'average american teenager' but I think I can help give those normal people a voice.

So, on with the introduction{which surprisingly has gotten easier now}. I guess a few things you should know are, one: I started this blog thing because I simply adore the movie Julie and Julia. And I very sure the amount of blogs soared through the roof when that movie first came out, along with the book 'the art of mastering french cooking'. But, I really don't care about that, i just think blogging is a really cool idea. Two: the purpose of this blog is to convey the life of me, to you and the rest of this massive world. Because I think truly, at least from what I have seen, the american teenager is wrongfully portrayed in most every movie and show. You don't have time to stop at your locker and chat, you can't stay up ALL night to study and then magical drink coffee and never make up the sleep. AND, the whole girl/guy ration is totally off balance. You more likely to get killed by a rabid kangaroo then get a boyfriend {or a girlfriend in some of your cases} within your freshman year. Trust me on this, I know. Lastly/Three: I'm pretty sure Im the only me on the face of this earth. I don't know about mars or pluto, but I 100% that Im the only me in this region of the solar system. So, I might as well share my views and thoughts with people. Also, I get very forgetful, so if I ever mention an important test, completely forget about it, then look back at a post or something, BANG, memory restored. So ya, my three reasons for doing a blog. Very exciting, i know.

Alright, more about me, cause I don't think I want to explain myself later on. Sure, I may be a teenager, but I really hate following every damn trend. {Ya, I just cussed. Deal, I have on hell of a clean mouth compared to my friends, so don't go thinking that teens are angel mouthed.} SURE, I enjoy the occasional fashion, but I bet it gets real tiring when you try to keep on top on all the fashion rules. And no, I do dress well, I just don't follow the conventional way of dressing. I break the rules of everyday life whenever i feel like it, so there is no reason to try and cover that up. So there is the fashion synopsis, here is the personality outline. In places were people's actual faces are involved {aka, not online, face to face confrontation} I'm deadly shy. Its like a disease that only kicks in when I'm talking to some person I don't know. I freeze up, I can only nod, maybe say 'ya' and thats about it. I become this polite machine, stuck in a sea of silence. Sometimes, I can get past it, and I'm really open. But otherwise, I'm only outrageous with my friends. OK, on the school level. I started my freshman year at high school {aka, 9th grade for you dummies} this fall. I looooooove High School, and I my friends that go with me there. Its not all the damn drama they make it on TV, either you like someone or you don't. And that is that, you may some crap behind their back, but otherwise you just immaturely stick your tongue out at them. 'Cause really, there is a hell of a lot of better stuff to do out there. OK, I admit it. There is drama in High School for some people, but for people like me who just hate it, no drama. Ignore drama, and BANG, no drama. AMAZING, I know.{note, this might not be a good idea for you melodramatic types who just live on drama, as you might die to lack of drama. tragic} Also on the High School note, the homework is like one giant monster ready to eat you alive. It comes up from behind and CHOMP. You fail! That massive assignment due today that you forgot is going to kill you now. So maybe you don't care for grades, but I would LOVE to study abroad, and good grades is a great way to achieve that goal!! ^w^ <- Hell yeah for the emoticon face.

OK, that was a hell of a lot longer then I thought it was going to be. So, if you made this far, I'm very proud of you. Go get ice cream, or since its Winter, Egg Nog might be better idea. So, please return, as I'm sure the rest of the year is going to get pretty interesting.

~Oliver <- Not my real name, so don't try nothing you pervy old men out there.